Hey guys. I know I haven't been writing lately, and it doesn't help that I haven't been on since Friday. I always want to be honest with you guys, especially with how I am feeling and doing. But I have been feeling terrible lately and I can not bare turning my blog into a depressing place to visit for you guys. And so I have been holding on from writing until I started feeling a little better. I didn't want to affect anyone in a negative way. I wanted to reach out and touch someone, relate with you all as human beings, or put a smile on someone's face. Beyond the person you see behind a camera, and as much as you can read off of who I am visually, there's a lot you can not see. I appreciate your love and support. I want to share to you all who I am. I am human, you are human. I am more than just a face.While I was hesitating on writing a blog that ran strictly on my emotions, in fear of turning this place depressing, I began to remember that this blog was originally created as just that- my outlet. I've welcomed you all to come in and take a look at my life and the emotions running within me. And you all came in to see the unveiled side of me. Bad or good, I know you guys will accept me. But as much as I have been going through, and as much as I want to avoid writing another sad blog, I want to just as much relate with you all. I am human. Going through tough times is part of living. The pain I feel inside reminds me I am alive. There is a lot trapped and dieing to come out. I feel it. It's all there. Today will not be another sad blog. Today is about you guys. About how I feel about you. It is about living. And the constant reminder of being alive, of being human, and of being just like you.
I appreciate the time you've spent on this page, in my room, in my head, and in my heart. I want to thank you guys so much. I remember the support I have received from you guys. You guys keep me up. You've reminded me I am not alone. Thank you for following my blog. Thank you for caring about me or simply finding me interesting. You... reading this right now. Thank you...
-I will be back soon. I promise, and I have yet to break a promise with you guys. I've missed you all. I am trying to be stronger, and to get myself back on my feet, with open arms and a open heart for you guys. I am sick of feeling sick to my stomach. It must end now.
Hey, long time no see. This is fishy. There will always be tough times. If it helps at all I don't mind being here for you to talk to about your problems. Everybody needs someone they can go to when life starts to shit on you.
ReplyDeleteI know if it wasn't for my friends, right now I would be a Diet Coke bottle full of the Mentos of depression with my cap left closed just waiting to erupt in a glorious spectacle.
Just from what I see from your camera I just feel you're too caring, nice and cute to be so sad in life.
It's nice to see that you can still look good even though you've been feeling like shit.
Two pretzels were walking down the street.
One was a salted.
If you understood that joke I hope I brought a smile to your face.
If only I could help you. I cant I can only offer myself as a Friend, and say courage, when you think the World is a dark place remember there is always a small light behind you in the form of a Friend to light your path, just because you don't see it, doesn't mean its not there. Love Always.
ReplyDeleteI miss hanging out with you Brendal and Val. I miss you guys soooo much. I might go on tonight just to sit back with some music and a funny chatroom conversation. I miss my mfc friends <3
ReplyDeleteMy late birthday present is arriving around the 21st, my sister as one like it so I know it will look great on you. ( Giant Bear Hug).
ReplyDeleteAw. Val, thank you so much. It means a lot to me that you've got out of your way to put a smile on my face. <33333 Thank you. I love you. ^^;
ReplyDeleteOh and I changed my name from Monochromesque to Joey, just in case that confuses you. >.<!
ReplyDeleteAw man if you were on last night I missed it. I don't go on this anywhere near as often as other stuff like facebook. I also tried to add you on my normal skype account under "Brendizzle." a while back. the other one I added you on was a temporary one because for the longest time I couldn't remember my old login id lol.
ReplyDeleteAs I seat here drinking coffee, waiting for my three hours of morning classes to start, I'm driven to your blog, everytime. Kisses and Hugz.
ReplyDeleteHere I am same place, same time, felling like a zombie, eating brekfast, watching other zombies passing by, iPod is playing, and this pops up " with a little help from my friends" Joe Cocker - Woodstock 1969. Just felt like sharing. One silent smile is worth one thousand hellos. :)
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ReplyDeleteYou always make me smile Val. That is one reason why I adore you so much. And on top of that, I am wearing your sweater with a silent smile. It looks good on me. ;) Thank you! xoxo
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